::the foghorn::

 

she didn't mind lying awake in the dark; she could think.  how thankful she was to be tall enough to carry off the new fashion in sleeves!  charm?  how much more charm counted than mere beauty, and she herself had it 'full measure and running over.  how strange that she of all girls should have fallen in love with a married man.  fog on the bay.  since childhood she had loved to hear that long-drawn-out, almost-human moan of the foghorn as she lay warm and sheltered in bed.  IT was on a night of fog they had spoken for the first time, although they had nodded.

i was 17 when i first performed gertrude atherton's short story to win a drama scholarship to eastern new mexico university (in the thriving metropolis of portales, new mexico).  i can't believe i still remember all the words.  i should have gone on to major in theatre, but i played it safe and chose education instead.  i never graduated.  these days i'm tired of playing it safe.  i want to believe forgotten wishes come true, past mistakes don't count.  that you CAN color outside the lines, step outside the box.  and change.  and go beyond what's familiar and comfortable.  and become something else even as you begin to approach 50.  i want something i've accomplished.  something no one can ever take away. 

"i just want a huge vat of coffee and my best friend to make me laugh and then i will go home and take a hot bath and finish my story." ~ lauren groff

Comments

[Kat]

I hear you sister girl. Playing it safe is for the birds. Sometimes I want to shine finishing my Masters in Ed and go to art school. You, my dear friend, can do anything. You are amazing and the whole wide world is opened up to you. You just need to choose. The choice is sometimes really hard. But you are strong and wonderful and I know you can MAKE magic happen.
love you,
kat

[Amy]

I spent a lot of years playing it safe and am only now beginning to realize that when we color outside the line, rekindle those past wishes and reinvent ourselves for the second or fifteenth or forty second time - those are the times that magic happens. And the magic we create for ourselves...that magic IS something that no-one can take away from us.

Sending you peace and love and a million fireworks...

XXOX
Amy

[Kristy Griggs]

Boy do I understand where you're coming from! I'm approaching 40 and wishing I'd had children (not that I've given that dream up, yet) OR settled on a career. I've fallen into a career as a copywriter, but it's never been a dream of mine.

SO, I've been struggling with the same issues here in Hotlanta, too. And I absolutely realize that what really counts is what I get to engage in every day--life, but I still want to feel great about what I'm doing with it.

For what it's worth I don't think it's ever too late to try something totally new. You can do it!

Cheers,
Kristy (Transplanta)

[Christy]

I love this post! I can absolutely relate to how you feel (it looks like others can too.)

I think you definitely can--Steve pointed out to me the other day that I should really think about changing my major to English when I go back to school in the fall rather than finishing my psychology degree. He reminded me that now is the time in my life that I should do what I really want; other people that are switching careers and starting to do the things they really wanted to, but were told they couldn't. What's the point in anything else?

GO FOR IT--whatever it is! Hugs, xoxo